Out of the Notebook and into the blog: My Smile is Intimidating? - Self Esteem of a Server

Sunday, July 20, 2014

My Smile is Intimidating? - Self Esteem of a Server

After being a host at Red Lobster for a few months, I became a server, and have entered a world of brutality.  Remember a thousand things at once, trying extremely hard to impress guests and to be constantly on my tip toes trying to not make any mistakes.  However, I've found that no matter how hard I can try, there will always be that one person that you can't please.  

Today my best friend came into Red Lobster to eat with his cousin, who I hadn't ever met.  I was obviously very excited to see my best friend and being a naturally very smiley person, I was all smiles.  Afterwards, being my curious self, I asked my friend if his cousin liked me…he replied saying his friend was intimidated by my smile.  

This bugged me.  That one little statement from a stranger, brought down my self esteem faster than poison ivy welts form on my legs when unknowingly step in a patch of it on the way to the lake (and considering I'm highly allergic to the stuff, it's pretty quick) and made me question myself.  Should I start smiling less?  Am I weirder than I thought?  Is my smile not pretty enough?  What is wrong with me?!  *breaks down crying over Red Lobster cheese biscuits*

And then I realized…why am I caring over one random guy's tiny first impression about how much I smile?!  What do I owe to him to even consider changing who I naturally am?  I have probably made 100's of wrong first impressions, it's human nature, as inevitable as the law of attraction.  Tonight I realized that there isn't any reason I should judge myself based on one customers first impression on me.    

This realization isn't anything that is earth shattering or brand new by any means, but it's something that is so easy to forget.  Have you seen the Stop the Beauty Madness Campaign that has gone viral?  It has simple stock images paired with blunt wordings that make us realize how absolutely ridiculous the strain of perfection society and even ourselves expect us to achieve.  

We all have those moments when our self esteem crashes.  What is something that drops, or has dropped, your esteem down in a matter of moments that you know is SO ridiculous?  Let's share our secrets in the comments!

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